Having enjoyed nearly 12 years of early retirement freedom, I understand what got me here and what’s necessary. I’m now in my early 60s and consider myself fully experienced in retirement or at least my version of retirement. I would think by now that I could peacefully go through retirement without being constantly nagged that I’m blowing it, but nooooooo!  I’m instead constantly battling with the retirement mortality creep. A two faced and unrelenting little monster that has creeped into my thought process and is always hanging around. 

I know why it’s there. Choosing to retire early funded from a less than obese portfolio comes with the paradox. Wanting to live a full and free life taking full advantage of time left here. But also not doing anything stupid that would cause blowing through the nest egg before leaving the planet. Is it possible to both love and hate this nagging creep?  

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Trying To Find Balance With The Retirement Mortality Creep

I’ve always told myself that life’s too short to waste on doing things you don’t want to do or live a life you don’t want to live. It was a keystone motivation to ditch the corporate rat race and strive for early retirement.

That awareness of having finite time was a primary motivation to get out while young is most likely when the morality creep was introduced. It was a love fest then because it was helping me meet my financial goals. The focus was all on working to save enough to fund life’s adventures before it’s too late to enjoy them. But time and mortality is a difficult concept to mentally quantify and reconcile. 

The thought of our own mortality is one thing when you’re young, healthy, and looking at it as 30 or 40 years plus out. It’s another after you start to feel the aches and pains that a lifetime of sports, bumps, bruises, and abuse your body is coming to collect on. It starts with hints of pain specifically designed to be our daily reminder that things are a changin. There’s a Liberty Mutual TV ad of kids skipping rope into old age with the final quip “everything hurts”. It’s only funny because of how true it is. That reality is exactly what the retirement mortality creep feeds on, just when our health and mortality all comes into better focus. 

Our brain either openly or subconsciously pays attention and figures it out. 

That’s the retirement mortality creep that can throw us off plan. When we start to think and act with the view of everything within an ever compressing timeframe of health and life, or for some maybe thinking it’s a lot longer than it really is. It can cause us to impulsively change our plan or how we want to live. Part of the problem is that this little creep which was a key motivator to have a happy fully funded retirement now talks out of both sides of its mouth. 

My most recent temptation and failure to handle the mortality creep –

Our coming together was unplanned and sudden. Without any doubt, she gave all the signals that I could have her if I wanted her. She was curvaceous and sexy, making me feel younger the minute I was in her presence. I felt something I hadn’t felt since my youth. I knew I entered into a minefield, but the nag of the retirement mortality creep screamed at me, life is short, when will you ever have this chance again? 

It convinced me to allow things to go too far. I was smitten and willing to kick a decades-long love to the curb to make room for her in my life. Throwing it all away to start a new chapter. One that I knew wouldn’t last long. 

She was a beautiful early 70s Corvette Stingray. The car of my teenage year’s dreams and what could be a new addition to my retirement’s automotive passions. The price was right and her condition was spot on. I test drove her and after an hour of checking her every inch, pacing a circle around her, and enduring the mental anguish listening to the voice of my mortality temptor in my ear, I came as close as one could to make her mine. I agreed to buy her but then painfully backed away from the deal. Why? Because the creep abruptly changed its tune and started loudly wondering if the hit to cash reserves might be bigger than expected. 

I checked back later as I questioned my decision. Within 3 hours she had gone home to be with another, ensuring there would be no decision backslide. A month later and I’m still not sure if it was a missed opportunity or successful rescue.

I was shaken and then realized what had happened to me. 

There wasn’t time to fully prepare for this deal. I started to rationalize a one time retirement budget-busting purchase on something that made no financial sense, but one that would add some welcomed passion into my retirement hobby. All because it dropped out of nowhere without time to completely think it through. The mortality creep convinced me that I deserved to have it while I’m still able to enjoy it. Or at least my idea of it, because it’s too easy to only see the upside when in this mortality mind-mode. 

That is until the creep changed course, forgetting all about pushing to take advantage because it’s a short life and living it up. Now this nag was focusing on the considerable ancillary costs associated with this, as is with most things in life. It was warning me that even though I have the cash to get it, maybe I’m spending money I’ll need much later in life to aid an older, broken down me.

I was mentally rushed during this decision because I knew the opportunity for her and my healthy active life were both fleeting. A bad combination when not prepared to do battle with the retirement mortality creep. It made me see how this slow unconscious reaction to the realization of leveraging my limited time to the fullest vs the chance of living a lot longer needing me to throttle myself now. One thing I certainly now understand, this creep sure cramps my mojo.

Mortality awareness can unnecessarily drive us to both take and avoid risk.

I wrote recently how I have been dealing with a spending problem. The problem of good savers being lousy retirement spenders. I even pledged to do better with YOLO opportunities before it’s too late. Even with that spending issue already mentally recognized, it still subconsciously played a part in how my latest fail went down. It shows me that it isn’t easy and takes more effort. 

It’s a mindwarp of mixed messages. 

• Don’t spend too much because you or your spouse might live to age 100 and outlive your money. 
• Don’t be a miser and miss out on living. Time is spent and can’t be bought back. 

I have no problems living a frugal life for all the day to day and little things. I’ve never struggled or regret any of that. The problem is when I really want to take rare opportunities to live large and make a big one-time purchase that bounces off of an overall portfolio strategy. Giving voice to the other side, you might need it as an old human. 

What This Latest Go Around With The Creep Has Taught Me

I think this latest battle between living life to the fullest vs being responsible with spending at all costs is that I tend to lean toward the safest route. Sure, I want to be the adventurous fun seeking freak, but it is hard for me to jump in without first thoroughly testing the waters. 

I need to remind myself of this Tony Robbins quote: “People will do more to avoid pain than they will do to gain pleasure.”  Just a little something to throw back at the creep and counter my safer route tendencies.

It’s easy to say embrace life. But even when knowing that life and health are fleeting, responsibility and respect for unknown possibilities can cause us to flinch. I wish I knew the answer or formula to balancing the retirement mortality creep’s mixed messaging. Especially for those like myself that tend to lean towards always taking the safe and risk averse approach. I think we all have to work that out for ourselves. But I am going to start by asking myself a couple of things.

Is it following a true interest or passion?

There is value in spending our limited time pursuing our interests and passions. Doing things that make us tick, even when it might cost us a little financially. The criteria it must meet is that It’s something that will bring pleasure into life.

Will it provide a great experience and worthwhile memories without causing long-term financial damage?

In the end it’s our pleasurable memories we appreciate. They keep us going and remind us we are alive. The dream car could have certainly done that for me. The trick is doing all that we can to make sure it isn’t a nightmare scenario we’re entering into. One that spends too much money or time in areas we can’t or wish to no longer tolerate. 

Can it be considered an investment? 

Not purely financially, but personally through the experience. Taking the family on a vacation could be viewed as an investment in the relationships. One time purchases like my recent car fail, I would have invested in myself and scratched an itch that occupies space on the bucket list. It could have added some fun to my retirement hobby. The car may or may not be a financial investment. But it would never be a total loss if later sold and well worth the experience.  

Is there a practical exit strategy if it goes wrong?

I made a living as an engineer countering all possible failure scenarios. This kind of thing shouldn’t be any different. If I were to enter into a situation where it later didn’t meet retirement financial, lifestyle, and passion needs, then I need to have set those exit indicators and have a plan to fix or walk away from it. 

Will I ever lose out to the retirement mortality creep in the future? Probably. I am as mistake prone as anyone else and can take the wrong creep argument for or against doing something new or different. I just need to learn something from it with every encounter. 

Deciding to stretch and explore new areas to live life to fullest during our ever shortening time frame means there will always be unknowns. But you won’t know for sure until you research and try. Turning dreams into reality is always an exciting and sometimes risky move. Like deciding to retire early. Which sure has been a successful investment in life’s precious and limited time.